Autism Watch: 2007

Posts Tagged ‘child

On Tuesday, BB had to go back to the neuro to discuss his migraines. It’s a drive to the neuro, about 40 minutes, and includes crossing several bodies of water and even more two-lane highways. It’s not a rough drive, but I do prefer to do it during daylight. By the time we’re there, BB is already impatient, and on the drive home? We’re required to make a pit-stop, either at a store for something cool, not a habit I want to encourage, or at a drive-thru for fries or nuggets. Since we’re very particular about what fast food we’ll allow him to eat, it’s not a slam-dunk, so I have to plan to drive a certain way in order to pass an ‘approved’ drive-thru. Nothing like turning a simple doctor visit into an event!

This visit, I told BB we’d stop by and get nuggets on the way home. He’d had a rough day at school, and I witnessed, when I picked him up, a teacher snapping at him, pretty loudly and over-the-top harshly about dropping a piece of paper on the ground. (Get a grip, woman, and remember, he’s someone else’s child. Discipline your way at home, but at school, there are nicer ways to reprimand.) He railed on and on about it all the way to the doctor, but the minute we got out of the car, his mood changed. Phew. He loves the doctor’s office, and is especially fascinated with the little door from the bathroom into the office. You know, the specimen door. I had to remind him, dude, look, urine tests sit there. Imagine what you’d be touching if you put your hand there or get your face too close to the door. It did not deter him enough, so I was really excited when he ran to the nurse counter to ask for a piece of note paper. Then he grabbed my check-writing pen out of my hand, as I’m paying the $30 co-pay, to write on this note paper. Then he drops it into the comments/suggestions box. Scary?

We get called in right away. He gets weighed, and I learned he’s gained 3 pounds in 3 weeks. Periactin anyone? That’s the nudge I needed to change medications, as it wasn’t doing enough for his headaches anyway. On into the room, where he regales the nurse with lovely stories from tv shows I wasn’t home when he watched (no, nothing that bad) and then tells the nurse “I’m serious, this is a serious story.” Doctor comes in, we do the exam, talk about migraine med changes, and BB starts with another story. And another. Thankfully, the doctor understands and was interested, quite possibly even entertained, but I’d lost all control. Short of taking him out of the office or physically restraining his mouth, he wasn’t stopping. Yep, ADHD and OCD displays their ugly heads quite evidently, and at least it’s in the doctor’s office, right?

The nurse empties the suggestion box. Finds the note. “Dr. XXX is epic!” We had to explain that epic means cool, but they seemed pleased. Phew. I’m really glad, as we have to go back in six weeks if the new medication isn’t working.

Epic. I guess if you have to go to the doctor a lot, it’s good to have an epic one.

I toyed with the idea of joining WordPress’s new Post a Day challenge. I came so close, but then realized a couple of key things that changed my mind.

1) I didn’t want to ruin a perfectly good adequate blog with forced posts. In other words, I didn’t want to throw up a post just because I felt committed to the challenge, as there are days that my head just isn’t in the game. Some days, it’s challenge enough just getting everything done that I have to get done, and the non-essentials sit by the wayside. Blogging, as much as I love it, is still a non-essential. While I’d love it to be more important somehow, it’d have to be more important to others than just me, and unless that happens, I can’t bump it up my personal list.

2) Some days, autism takes a back seat. That’s not to say my son is suddenly cured on some days, but just that I don’t think about autism and its profound effect on our lives every single day. Don’t get me wrong, the “a” word is there each and every day in some regard, but there are days that I just want to call “good days.” I want to just be with my son, just be a ‘normal’ mom and go throughout the day without focusing on autism. I want to do the laundry, make dinner, supervise homework, plan the next day’s events, pray, chat, have a glass of wine, hop on my elliptical and ‘be,’ rather than being a mom with a child with autism. In short, autism doesn’t define my life, and there are other aspects of my life that deserve focus. I have other kids, a husband, a job, hobbies, and that’s all I need.

I’ve been told that on my personal Facebook page, I don’t mention enough about autism. Enough? Who determines what enough is? Honestly, I don’t want to see my Facebook newsfeed and see nothing but autism. I’m going to say it once, quietly, and never again: some people seem to thrive on discussing autism and the attention the hardships bring. Don’t take that wrong — well, it’s not entirely nice, I suppose, but sometimes it seems like when the attention over one issue dies down, there’s something else, an ongoing poor me saga that just drains you, and you don’t even see them on a face-to-face basis, ever. There’s unity in sharing hardships and giving/getting support and sharing resources, and that’s a necessity, but I can’t believe that some people don’t have any good in their lives that they can’t share something other than a newspaper article that’s about an abused autistic child, a comment about some wasted research, or how their school gave more money to the gifted children that week than the special ed program or how their husband didn’t spend 467 minutes supervising therapy with the child as they did. When life stinks, we want to vent and get support, but life stinks in more ways than just autism. If I focus just on autism, I miss out on everything else, and the other things that stink don’t get the attention they need. So, for me, “enough” is as often as I want to post about it. If it’s not enough for someone else, there are a lot of blogs or FB friends out there that you can head to for more autism-related news.

I do have another blog, totally unrelated to autism other than a mention here and there in regards to life with my family and things that occur in our lives. In a general sense. I’m not the best blogger there either, only posting a few days a week. I hope to get more devoted to that blog as well, but my little guy deserves more than the back of my head while I’m at the computer.

Happy New Year’s to everyone! (A day late is better than never, right?)

And it was going so well…

Once upon a time, it was a quiet afternoon. Dh was at Costco, and my daughters were reading, napping, just hanging out in their room. Older ds was at his friend’s house.



High-pitched screaming. Banging. Yelling. More banging.

Peace. Tranquility. Quiet. Gone.

Ds quickly made his way downstairs and it escalated. He went into a rage like I’ve not seen him do in weeks. Don’t get me wrong, he gets mad still and has his meltdowns and tantrums, but this was worse than any in a while. It took a while to get him into the crying stage, beyond the screaming stage, through the throwing everything he could grab stage, beyond self-injurious stage, and completely past the hurting mommy stage. At one point, he lunged me from beyond and jumpd on my back and head like a crazy monkey from a bad, b-grade movie. It took older dd to get him off my back, with me prying his hands out of my hair. My glasses made it out unscathed, because I’m good at ducking but mainly because I tossed them off in the 4-seconds dd held him after she got him off my back. And no marks!

He’s out front playing football with dh, after a while of self-constructed O.T. spinning on the swing out back. He’s not going to be on the computer again until Wednesday — that’s a computer exile because the reason for his meltdown was that the computer had some issue in the midst of him playing it.

Life is good.

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