Autism Watch: 2007

“It’s good for him, you need to do it.”

Posted on: February 10, 2009

How many times do we hear that from people? You know, those things that supposedly are good for our kids, things that help them mature/grow/learn or become more prepared for their future but break your heart and are really hard to do. (Isn’t being a kid supposed to be a lot of fun?)

This morning, I did one of those things. I know I needed to do it, but I didn’t want to. It probably sounds like no big deal to parents of typical kids, but I … <gulp>….walked away before the bell rang at school and left him on the playground.

Sniff.

Watching him walk away from me, an odd-ish gait because he’s not entirely comfortable, and he wanted me to stay. But “it’s good for him.” Blah. He was looking for friends, and after running back to me for one more hug (and a loud “I love you, Mom!” which entirely surprised me because he wants to look cool there) he still couldn’t find anyone. The last look I had of him this morning was trying to get some other kid to give him five, and the kid just wouldn’t cooperate. (But, I was so far away, I couldn’t hear what he was saying so who knows how ds approached it.)

I hate these things we have to do for them that we know hurt them at the time, but are good for them in the long run. If I don’t help him separate better in the morning, it’s going to be harder for him as he gets older — kids are brutal, and already he gets funny looks from time to time. (And here it’s February, and he’s still not been invited to a single birthday party for anyone in the class…but whatever, I digress.)

Think happy thoughts for us. Tomorrow we have an IEP. We have an excellent school and admin, but still, it’s an IEP…happy thoughts, please, happy thoughts.

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5 Responses to "“It’s good for him, you need to do it.”"

Happy thoughts are on the way from New York for your IEP!
(and nasty thoughts for the little jerk who failed to return the high-five…)

Good luck with the IEP. As hard as it must have been, you did do the right thing!

I feel for you as I read your story. I need to work on those things that are “good for him” but are sooooo hard to do. My son is 18 and those things didn’t get any easier for me. (But I’m a whimp!)

I hear ya on the “good for him” stuff. It’s so hard. I hope the IEP meeting went okay! Those are never fun.

How did the IEP go? We have a meeting for my dude next week, pre-IEP planning and, hopefully, correction for a misguided science teacher.

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