Autism Watch: 2007

Baby, It’s Hot Outside

Posted on: June 20, 2008

Seven days of ‘school’s out for summah…’ — he’s wayyyyy too into Guitar Hero and he loves to sing me that song. Now I just have to wish he’d get the words right.

Anyway, it’s 108 here today. I’d bought a ton of outdoor toys for ds to play with to keep him happily occupied, without thinking we’d get a nasty heatwave that would blow my plans to smithereens. So, here we are, grasping at things to do, while the bubbles, sand toys, and chalk boxes sit outside in the sun.

Yesterday, dd took ds to the beach for the day. They spent six hours digging and building, and ds even attempted to surf, much to his unhappiness. Ds+1 long board+2 people holding his hands=wipeout and hysterical tears. And mommy wasn’t there.

Summertime is going to bring some challenges. Today ds woke up with a rash everywhere that sand had managed to touch, and it required a quick trip to the store for an oatmeal bath, then a long bath. He doesn’t earn the nickname “high maintenance” for nothing!

One phenomena I’ve seen is that friend invitations are very frequently one-sided during summer…or maybe it’s all year long and I’m just noticing it more now? Ds has a few friends that call to ask to come play with him, again and again. One of them invites him to their house. So is our house just super-fun? Or is he too much to handle, though others haven’t really tried? I try to understand people, because I know the fear of what could happen if he melts down, if he gets upset…but it’s a lot of ifs, and I wish people would give him a chance. I know, or at least I like to hope, that there are other reasons — suddenly changing plans, illness, etc., things that pop up without warning — but it happens with so many people. We have kids over, and they say ds is welcome to their home at any time, or they say they’ll invite him over next time, but when he asks to come over, they’re always busy, and the invitation never comes. However, there they are at our door again, wanting to play. If I say no, ds doesn’t have the social interaction he needs just for the sake of making a point….or is it really more than a point, if he isn’t having the fun and opportunity of enjoying someone else’s toys and home? Is it just me, or is this another symptom of autism? Is it one of those painful realities that’s a result of being upfront that your child is autistic? Yet, if you don’t tell them and they can’t figure out why your child is having apparent social issues with their child, and they light into you because your child is ‘rude’ or ‘mean’ or aggressive, is that any better? So far, ds doesn’t realize it, another symptom of autism, I suppose. He does ask me now and then why so-and-so doesn’t invite him over, but ds also would prefer to be in his own home, with his own routine, more often than not. And I’d prefer him to be like any other kid and play at others’ houses. Then again, maybe this has nothing to do with autism and everything to do with me and my house being available?

Just another one of those puzzles that I, well, puzzle over. I worry about the big things with autism. Will my son learn to eat, and like, more than pancakes, chicken nuggets and pizza. Will he have a successful year in school with a new teacher. Will he learn to wait in line, not throw toys when mad, and not hit himself in the head when truly upset? Should we really have to worry about if people will be as nice to him as he is to them?

Moving on….it’s 108 here. Have I said that yet? We’ve got just a week left before The Vacation, and all shopping is done. My last worries are of things that I can’t pack: pancakes, chocolate almond milk, and a warm bath, all things very necessary for happy days. The thought of packing makes me want to procrastinate until, hmmmm, say, Thursday or Friday of next week. Then I have to show our housesitter where everything is, how not to set off the alarm and have the police show up, and how to take care of all 47 animals, not to mention the blind dog. Yes, really.

Here’s to hoping everyone is enjoying their summer, especially now that it’s officially here.

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1 Response to "Baby, It’s Hot Outside"

Hi there,

I just wanted to let you know that I’ve enjoyed perusing your blog today. My son has SPD/SID,not autism, but there are a lot of similarities.

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