Another Dentist Appointment Completed

Today little dude had what is hopefully his last ‘work’ appointment…you know, where work outside of the normal cleaning and checkup gets done. I had to do this one on my own, since I “HAD THE DAY OFF.” Notice those words in caps -  apparently they mean that today is just a fun day, you know, where you have fun all day long and nothing makes you tired or keeps you busy. But anyway, dh didn’t have the day off and we figured since this wasn’t a root canal, I was good to go handling it on my own. Sounds good in theory, right?

Happily, this is a situation where the theory was in keeping with the reality. Barnacle Boy laid down, let the nitrous do its thing, and cracked us all up, even throughout the novocaine shots around the two teeth that were being filled. He even told the dental assistant she was sort of pretty, then said “I can’t believe I just said that.” His speech went really quick, he was thinking fast and the filter was entirely 100% off. SO cute.

(If you don’t believe in using nitrous on your autistic child, I respect that decision but understand that we chose to use the nitrous for our own reasons, so please respect your decision as well, without the assumption that we aren’t educated or didn’t research. Thank you. And if you don’t care what I do, kudos, and I apologize for the off-topic interruption!)

Once we got home, BB laid around for all of an hour, devoured a big bowl of vanilla ice cream, then literally ran off to make animated cartoons on his computer. He just finished dinner with us, where he ate an entire turkey bratwurst and a handful of tater tots. Now he’s back upstairs animating. A new hobby!

In a few months, when we move, we’ll have to choose a new dentist. Not necessarily looking forward to it, though our current dentist has offered to refer us to dentists in our new area and fwd on records. We’ve learned that when you choose a dentist, ask a lot of questions. Decide what you’re comfortable with and what you can’t live with. Check out not only if they accept your insurance, but try to gauge how willing they are to work with them on your behalf. Add in autism and you have to find out what accommodations they’ll make, how quiet/loud the office is, how trained the staff is to work with us, and even things like wait time. I’m tired just thinking about it..and I have to do this with a pediatrician, a neurologist, a family practitioner and the dentist.

 

Sharing in the Autism Community: Really?

When my son was dx’d initially, online communities saved me. My husband was in serious denial, and I didn’t know anyone offline that had any experience with autism, so I spent hours seeking out help, support, information, anything. I was one of those people who knew nothing about ASDs, as even with all my son’s issues, we assumed that at worst, we were dealing with Sensory Integration Disorder, so we started this with absolutely no clue. I was desperate to find people who knew what we were dealing with and could give us some guidance, and email groups were it.

Since then, there have been numerous times I’d turn to the online communities for help — referrals to providers, opinions on therapies, suggestions on handling situations, or just “I know how you feel.”

But this week? I feel like the time has come for me to step away. I want to stay on top of what’s going on in the community at large, such as research, news, events, etc., but I can do that without being actively involved in email groups. I unsubbed from five groups yesterday, and while I felt just a tinge of sadness, I was overwhelmingly relieved. I felt, and feel, enormously liberated, and I am even more glad I did it today than yesterday.

Lots of things contributed to the decision — not just one event, though it was one email that finally pushed me off the fence. Over the years, I’ve seen a lot of emails that make me shake my head. I can participate by stating something that’s going on and get no response, and someone else two minutes later can say almost the same thing and get nine sympathetic responses. That’s the nature of the online community, as timing is everything and people respond when they’re available, but it’s disheartening when you feel invisible. I’ve seen new members get jumped on for asking basic questions. A lot of people ask about the flu vaccines; some of those people are welcomed while others are borderline attacked or get posts implying they’re simply not educated for even considering the vaccine. Some people want to debate when all you want is information or share your opinion on someone else’s. Basically, any response you make is fair game for attack anymore, and it didn’t use to be this way. I’m not sure what’s going on in the autism community, but the divisiveness that used to be focused on biomedical vs. traditional is growing. We as a community want the freedom to do what we want with our children, as in “How dare they try to make me vaccinate!!” but we turn on each other so quickly. I’ve mentioned it before, so I won’t digress but I wonder what it’ll be like in another six months. Where will parents of newly diagnosed children go then?

Don’t get me wrong — not every group is this way. There are wonderful people in the community who will still take the time to guide, support and give a virtual hug, but there are many people who will tell you you’re wrong, make assumptions about what you’ve said/done, and give you a virtual snub. Be careful what you share online. You can only explain your concerns or situations in so many words in the written form, and it can and will be open to interpretation by anyone that sees it. Responses can be harsh, even if you’re in the worst mood to deal with it. If someone has made a judgment about you, such as “not biomedical, not doing enough,” the responses you get will be tempered by that pre-formed opinion.

It’s like any other group, online or off. I’ve learned I just don’t have the time anymore to engage. I don’t want to read the arguments regarding what group to donate money to, I don’t want to read about how disgusted people are that others in the world dare to believe in a flu shot, and I can’t take one more whine from a previously stay-at-home-mom who just started getting IHSS a few months ago and is home all day alone while her kids are in school yet is peeved that IHSS rates are less. Or how we working moms get “respite” while we’re at work all day, yet it’s our tax contributions that are paying for respite for others. Life is stressful enough, I don’t need to have it added to and when I found myself hitting “delete” more than “read,” I know it’s time.

Don’t let my opinion sway you if you’ve never been in an online community and want to give it a shot. Really, they aren’t all bad. But, be cautious. Consider what you’re looking to get out of responding, and what you can live with. Be prepared for negativity, and don’t give identifiable details. I used to answer just to join in, then I realized how much time I was wasting — I work, I have a job and my time is at a premium, so if I want to join in a conversation, I have other opportunities with people I actually know and trust. That’s the problem with the online world, it’s easy to feel a part of the group and easy to feel you can trust people because ‘it’s just words.’

I’m going to save my words now for my anonymous blogs, for my offline friends, and for personal emails between individuals. It’s truly liberating to realize how much time I’ve saved myself and how I no longer need that kind of communication. And I’m realizing that wisdom does come as you get older! Who knew I’d ever really believe that cliche.

Now I’m signing off to see if I can calm the little guy. He’s getting some serious anxiety over waiting on someone to arrive, and I need to help him work it off or he’s going to be an overstimulated bundle of nerves.

Where to Begin?

Swine flu. It kicks your butt, and that of your entire family. No more than any other flu, and certainly not worth the vaccine, but nonetheless, it not only kicks your butt but it kicks it to the curb four houses down, into the gutter, through the sewer and out into the ocean 67 miles away. Four weeks later and I am still sporting a mild cough.

So there you have reason number one that I’ve not been blogging. My eyes were spinning at the end of the day, as I still worked during my bout (except for one day where even blinking and breathing was painful), and I was caring for Barnacle Boy, who scared us for a couple of days when the fever continued to hover around 103. Both the girls ended up with it, then the husband. Other son ended up with some cough and congestion last week, but that’s as far as it’s gotten. He’s oh so lucky.

I love Christmas. Why do I say that, you wonder? Because I love it more than Halloween..yet Halloween turns out to be this huge busy deal and before you know it, October’s gone and I’m wondering how to spend Veteran’s day with the kids who are out of school, yet I’m not because I have the Monday before off. Halloween this year consisted of two major parties, a few smaller events, and then the Trick or Treat Fest of the year at our house. We have this ginormous maze constructed in the front yard, from the curb I’d previously been kicked to through the yard, the driveway and out the side of the yard to the other street, complete with roaming monsters of the Freddie Krueger and zombie-type, scary movie music, and screaming … adults. A lot of the kids collected candy at the end of the driveway and backed away hoping Freddie didn’t see them.

Yet, I am <quietly> glad Halloween is over. I’m still tired. We went off-roading the weekend before Halloween and had, let’s just say, a little accident. Wear your seatbelts no matter how slow you are going, even if you are driving over a rut in a driveway. (No, that’s not what happened, I am just making a point. Heed my point, really.) Rollbars make nasty, ugly, sore and painful indentations on your eyeballs, eyelids, cheekbones, foreheads and noses. Trust me on this. Once you get the blood out of your clothes (and the off-road vehicle’s seats), you will not want it there again. I’m still sporting a crescent under the eye and eyeshadow is one of those things I have to really, really consider before I apply.

This past weekend was another huge Halloween party, this time adults only. (Unless you count the 20-somethings…my two oldest kids and their friends…who crashed it around 11:30pm just to see why Mom and Dad looked forward to the party all year.) Good thing my costume came with sunglasses to cover most of the bruise. I was Trinity, and husband was Neo. We were simply awesome.

So, how is Barnacle Boy doing after all this? Well, a few days before Halloween, he had to have an emergency baby root canal. (This was the, hmmm, 4th, I think?) He was not happy. Dh met me at the dentist and said he did great in the procedure. I drove him home, with him being the quietest (and creepiest) I’ve ever seen him while awake. He went to school the next day and recuperated impressively fast. Then the week got more and more chaotic during pumpkin hunting, then carving, cookie decorating and guests. Come Monday night, he was DONE. We got through the evening of clean-up and declared yesterday and today guest-free days. The cell phones were turned down and tv choices were BB’s. I even made a mad rush to Target to get Stratego, the game he had to have after playing it the last night of his two-year program he completed last week. (WAY TO GO, DUDE.) He came home from school, opened it, and declared it THE WRONG STRATEGO. (There really is one Stratego though. I know this because I researched it.) Pieces went flying, mad words were said (by him…not me…I stood there in amazement thinking “Don’t ruin The Wrong Stratego, I can return it!”) and an hour later, he was calmly eating an Oreo as we prepared to leave for his parent-teacher conference, where we proudly learned he’s academically more than a grade ahead but in need of more help for social skills, classroom participation and appropriate conversation. Always something, right?

That’s pretty much a uber-fast version of the last month and I know I’ve left things out, but I guess I need something else to blog about on a slow day in the future, yes? I know it will happen, and the fact I’ve admitted that is step 1 in my Blogger Improvement program. Admitting you have a problem is key. I admit it. My name is Dee and I am not the best blogger lately.

But that will change. With autism, there’s always something to whine about, complain about, or just sigh about. And with an awesome beautiful kid, there’s always things to brag about, be proud of, and happily share. I just need to find the time.

Our Responsibility is to Our Kids, and No One Else

I haven’t blogged recently — busy (like everyone else), migraines, dd having seizures, sick kids, and in general, just not sure what to say. I don’t want a blog full of only rants about how bad my neighborhood is, how mean people are, and how tired I am of being afraid to answer my doorbell. Until I had something non-rant like, I decided silence was golden.

But — you knew there was a but coming — I wanted to come out of hiding to add my opinions to the topic-at-large right now. You know the one, the one where we as a community in general are pretending we actually have a right to know, or a right to know better, than what another family should have done or has gone through. You know, that kind of judgment that we absolutely hate to have pronounced on us.

I love the friends I’ve made in the autism community. I’ve learned more from these fellow trenchmates than anywhere else, yet I still feel, and have mentioned before, that sometimes we’re the least tolerant of each other, yet we expect, or demand, that tolerance from anyone outside of the autism community. This seems like an extreme of that, and it’s pretty sad, for lack of fancier adjectives. Sad.

Without repeating everything others have said, my thoughts are this: the Travoltas are humans. They are parents who love their children, except they have money and celebrity. Why does that money or celebrity make them responsible for sharing their personal trials or tribulations? So they didn’t tell the world their child had autism. If that was me, you’d not blink an eye. But throw in money and celebrity, and I should share? Where’s my privacy? Where are  my rights? My child’s rights?

Leave the Travoltas alone. Their child died. He is gone. They are suffering the biggest loss a parent can suffer. Leave them be. They didn’t owe us any facts. No celebrity does — if they do, it’s a bonus and we should be thankful instead of expecting it. In fact, now, I’d expect less celebrities to come forward. Who wants the scrutiny, the judgment, the “you should do xxx and not do xxx” that the Travoltas are seeing now? How dare people hassle them for their choice of medication, or no medication? People, we weren’t there. We aren’t there. They owe us NOTHING. Back the flock off.

There, I said it. And on the other side, I do wonder why autism is seen as something, by Scientology, that cannot be recognized, but I’m not a Scientologist (thank God) nor will I ever be, so I can’t speak further to that. If they find it shameful or fictitious or unmentionable because it may require psychotropic drugs…well, I’ll just leave my thoughts to your imagination in that regard, though I will say, doesn’t God love us all?

On that note, I hope something else happens soon to distract from this situation. There are so many more urgent things to discuss, like my son’s new social skills program, YAY! I say we all talk about that, until something more exciting comes along. Sound good?

Dreading the Blog

I guess there’s no other way to put it politely. I’ve been avoiding the blog. I deal with autism all day every day, in some aspect or another, and lately, when I have a spare minute, the last thing I feel like doing is blogging about it. More autism? No thanks, I’ll pass.

But, I think I’m over it. Or at least for now?

The last few weeks…I don’t want to re-live them, but they’ve taken away a lot of faith that people really do love thy neighbor. Maybe I was naive that they ever really did, but I guess I’d been lucky. I’d had good neighbors and aside from the occasional nosey stranger, going out in public was getting easier. But now? I don’t let my son out in the front yard without constant supervision. Out in public, like at the county fair just last Monday, we had to stay on him like glue, after a couple of random unknowns spoke out of turn. (Who knew an empty marshmallow shooter was dangerous to sleeping iguanas?)

But, onwards and upwards. We’ve packed our garage and our china is boxed. House plans are chosen, and tentative house sale dates chosen. It’s not only a reality now, but it’s an agenda that is going to be daily for quite some time now. On a good note, BB is ready for it. He’s ready for a fresh start, new neighbors that won’t talk crap about him because they have nothing better to do. He won’t be blamed for their inability to control their own children. We’ve learned a lot from this experience, and we’re thankful that we can walk away from the garbage. The small-minded ignorant people can’t leave that behind, no matter where they go. We’ll soon have family to celebrate holidays with, and while we’re going to miss our close friends, BB is going to have 5+ acres to run around on. Animals to chase. Bugs to corral. Gardening to help me with. Healthier food, because we’re going to fish from our pond and eat our homegrown veggies and fruit. Mom and Dad will have less errands, so the stress will decrease and the overall pace will be more enjoyable.

In the meantime, school is doing well. He visits the nurse’s office often — ‘burning fingers,’ ’sore legs,’ or ‘too hot.’ But the staff sees him for what he is: a sweet little guy who likes to talk and is entertaining but just needs to vent and get things out of his system. Like us, they’ve learned it’s better to give him ten minutes of time or he’ll whine and be unhappy for 30. Ten minutes of attention, even five in a pinch, make all the difference. He starts a new social skills program in a couple of weeks, at school (once a week) and we’re also working on using Rick Lavoie’s recommended approach towards dealing with his behavioral and discipline issues. It was recommended at his weekly therapy and we really like it. The DVD is called “When the Chips are Down.” It’s old (think late-80s-ish?) but the process is timeless.

So, there you have it. More personal viewpoints on daily life with autism and less of the general perspective. We’ll see what tomorrow brings!

Mom, I Have No Friends!

How do you teach your kid that yes, other kids are mean? How do you even begin to acknowledge to yourself that yes, other kids are meaner than you can imagine?

I know, in the scheme of things, focusing on this is weird. But, when it’s a daily issue in your house, a daily facet of your child’s autism, it’s got to be a focus. I can’t ignore it. I can’t teach my child how to work on social issues when the only opportunities he has are negative ones. I can’t tell him that yes, the world is basically good, just seek it out, when sometimes your own faith in people is shot.

Don’t assume this is our only problem — it’s just the one that I’m fired up about so much because lately, it’s worse than it used to be, through no fault of our own, and because it’s something that we can’t control. We can arrange BB’s schedule for optimal success, we can provide proper food for the best nutrition and chance that BB will eat it. We can work with his school to be sure his seat, his homework amount, and the environment, all work together for his own good. We can turn on our air and keep the house cool enough, cut his pancakes before putting on the syrup, and make sure his blanket is washed so it’s soft. But I can’t stop the neighbor kid from telling the only other kid in the neighborhood who Nasty Witch hasn’t gotten to, that they should hide from BB. That they should push him down and tease him. That it upsets him if they call him Stupid. I can’t stop my son from being upset when his friend pushes him down because the other kids says to, or from being hurt at bein called stupid. It’s the uncontrollable factors, the things that are caused by others peoples’ ignorance or refusal to even care, that can negate all the other good you’ve experienced. We adults can blow it off…mostly…but kids? Not so much.

So today,  BB’s friend from school a couple of years ago is over here to play with him. We invited him over and we are so glad he was available and wanted to come. I’ve mentioned him before, how cool both he and his family are. They’re outside now, on the slip and slide. Oh wait, they’ve unplugged it (and put it away? who are these kids??) and now have the backyard hose going down the slide on the playset. Can you say mess? And cost? But I won’t stop them for a million dollars. They are smiling, having a blast, and being creative. Who can fault that??

Just SO Tired of It.

Tonight, a neighbor lady yelled at my son. Again. No, this isn’t the same lady that I had to confront a few weeks back for telling another boy not to play with my son. This lady, she has only smaller children and no autism experience, and apparently she feels that it’s okay for her to discipline my son or take issue with everything her son says mine does. It’s so frustrating, so aggravating, and so unfair.

I know, I whine a lot about things that happen, and I’ve been negative lately. Darn right. I’m just burned out on the ignorance out there. I know it’ll get better — rationally, I know good people are out there, but why aren’t some of them my neighbors instead of these people?

I’m at a loss, unsure what to do. I want this lady out of my face, but I don’t want another problematic neighbor. I want her to leave the parenting to me and stop making a big deal out of everything. Oh, yeah, and the “I’m going to tell your mom!” (while her child is over in my driveway setting off my car alarm) threats need to stop, too.

Ideas?

And thankfully, Dh comes back tomorrow. No third week out of state. Thank God.

Nope, still not better today

Yesterday morning, I woke up to a broken coffeemaker. Hot coffee (if you can call it that) pouring out the spout of the dispenser onto my counter. Too weak to put in a cup, since the water wasn’t in with the grounds long enough to brew, so I had to lay it to rest out in my trashcan, hot water and all, all without any coffee. Thank God, I have a backup coffeemaker in my RV. However, it’s just a temporary machine so I still have to shop for a nice one. Anyway, my point is that yesterday started off bad and by the time I went to bed, I had quite a few more grey hairs and wrinkles than I did when I got up. The coffeemaker should have been a warning.

Last night I posted an entry about BB’s behavior. I mentioned how it was the first time he hadn’t come back to say sorry. Well, about 30 minutes later, he did. It was a lot longer than it normally takes, but he did. Then he went back to bed, minus the TV as I was keeping that remote hidden. How cute you are, phew, glad we got through that.

Ha.

This morning all was good until we got to the school parking lot and he realized he’d forgotten his “Gangsta” hat. Other than the fact I hate the word “gangsta” and I want him past this phase of finding that cool, I wasn’t going to go home and get it and bring it back. Buddy, you need to learn to remember it. Gas is now $3+ a gallon here, the lot is more mobbed than Circuit City at 4am the day after Thanksgiving when they’re advertising $299 computers, and I work. Once he realized I was serious, he was ticked. He started rolling his backpack back at me in an angry way — which of course didn’t hurt me, but it did raise eyebrows of other “what a brat!” parents. You know, those people who see a child misbehaving and automatically assume I’m not controlling him. And sometimes I can see why it looks that way, as I could have pulled him aside and given him the “You will stop NOW” speech (as the softspoken, “Honey, this isn’t how to …” speech wasn’t going to work) but then he’d have melted down more. More people would have stared, and he’d have entered his new class crying and standing out even further. Picking my battles, I abided when he said “Go away and leave me alone.” I was sad…not because it hurts my feelings so much as I hate for him to go through life this way. He’s at school 7.5 hours, and I want them to be as good as possible. He needs to learn, to make friends, and to have fun, and this mood doesn’t do that. I still left though. I walked far enough away to see his bright shirt fade in the distance. And he never once turned around.

I’m not sure how pickup will go. My 20-yod will be picking him up, I’ve gotta stay geared up for what his mood could be like tonight. Nothing’s working. He has therapy tonight, so for 2.5 hours, they can work on it, but I’ll be alone with him on the freeway after. That 15-minute drive could mean a lot of ranting from him. I have a good stereo at least.

And things were going so good!

Sometimes, BB’s moods can literally change as fast as you can flick a switch..minus the switch. Things seem good, he seems compliant, and you’re able to relax. Then WHAM, it hits. The mood shift.

Not sure what brought it on tonight. He’d been testy all afternoon, easily riled but in a way that he’d just respond like “yeah, so, whatever.” A mean kind of sarcasm, intended to show his complete and utter disrespect and disregard for anyone else. His first day of school was today, but there were no problems there. We got home, and he told me about three things that made him happy. He showed me his homework, and I left to run and get yet another batch of school supplies. (But, luckily, none for his class! Not sure if she just hasn’t sent the list home yet, or there isn’t any. Dare I hope?) I came home, he was playing with the boy around the corner. You know, Boy A from The Day from Hell a couple of weeks ago. (Boy A is the good boy in the story.) He supposedly accidentally ran into a smaller neighbor child on his bike, admitted it, and I made him go apologize. He said “sorry,” and stalked off, arms folded, head down. On one hand, it was a huge step, something he wouldn’t normally do. On the other hand, we’ve got a ways to go. He even was invited to go to the park with another neighbor girl from his class. Yay!

Fast forward until he returns inside and I have to make him eat dinner. It was a you push, I push (not literally, just figuratively) type of dinner, where he’d eat a bite, wander, I’d make him return, he’d have another bite. And it all went downhill from there. I had to make him get in the shower, help him wash, and while he was in there, took away his Nintendo DS and assortment of related gadgets, hide his TV remote, and let him know there will be no playing outside after school tomorrow. I hate taking that away, but the “Shut your BIG.FAT.MOUTH” put me over the edge. He was made to go straight to bed after teethbrushing, without a story or anything. It’s been 45 minutes, and he’s still not called me out to say sorry, which is unusual. He seems so bent on staying mad. No matter what I did, he said “Fine, whatever. Shut up.”

Dad’s still in Pennsylvania, beautiful but in the middle of nowhere. Our ability to talk for any period of time is minimized by his work schedule and three-hour time zone difference. I’m up at 5am, but he’s already been working a couple of hours by that point. We tried to talk tonight — I went on a serious rant after I heard the latest form of ‘no new taxes,’ or as I call it, California’s stealing of my money. (Don’t we normally have to apply for loans? Why can they just take an ‘interest-free loan’ out of our paychecks, on top of increased yearly taxes, higher car registration rates, and everything else costing more. How do people live?? I digress. Let’s just say it’s definitely motivated us to be sure our house is up for sale at the proper time so we can get the heck out. I can’t do it here anymore.) Dh gave me lists of lists to write down, but when BB started acting up, it all went out of my head. I might remember when I have a chance to breathe, which at this rate will probably be on Saturday.

I don’t mind being single mom. I stay up later, I have my laptop out without fear of noisy keys, I cook when we want it, and I’m capable of doing just about all I need to do. (Okay, so I had to ask dd’s bf to take out my trash cans. But, that’s not my fault our RV is in the way, right?) I miss dh, but I was a single mom of two kids when we met, and I lost my mom young. I have no real family around, and I’ve been independent for a long time. Sadly, I really miss the reinforcement right now. I am exhausted. 5am comes early, and with school dropoff/pickup, chores, grocery shopping, Costco trips, numerous Target trips, getting crickets and goldfish for the animals, cleaning out the turtle tank, signing the bajillion school forms, and then BB…I hate to whine, but I’m tired. I took a melatonin tonight, hoping I can sleep all the way through. Of course, that depends on how well BB sleeps. One nightmare or sleepwalking event will kill it, but I can hope.

Tomorrow night we have BB’s therapy, and I am hoping to let them know the issues we’re seeing and see what help we can get. I know he doesn’t want to be a boogar, but when he seems so unfazed by his affect on others, I have to look to see what we can do to stop that. He’s such a doll, so loving and so smart, but when he’s telling you to shut your mouth, over and over, and looks at you so emotionless, it’s hard to remember the rest.

I do have respite on Wednesday night, and my friend and I are heading out to see Julie/Julia. I can’t wait! Not only does it just look cute and I love Meryl Streep, but it’s about a blogger! Who here can’t relate??

What a Coincidence!

To me, it’s always such a remarkable coincidence that when my son shows up on the front yard of any of the kids in the neighborhood, they suddenly have to go inside for dinner…go clean their room…go dig up the bodies in the backyard. Okay, so that last one was an embellishment but you get my drift.

Note to parents who don’t want their little preciouses to learn compassion and how to play with someone different: come up with some new reasons. Open your child’s mind as well as your own. Bigotry comes in all shapes and sizes, and you’re perpetuating it.

Now that I’ve gotten that off my chest — within five minutes of yet another miraculous Emptying of the Neighborhood — I feel better, and I can go on with my excitement over another great day of being with BB. I worked a half-day — Fridays are frequently half-days during the summer where I work, yayyyy! – and then we hit up the local Brunswick alley, where I must have seemed like the biggest ignoramoose ever seen. How much is a game? Oh, per person? Shoes cost too? How do I reset the pins? Bumper guards, yeah, can we have them, too? Do we each throw the ball twice per turn, or do we go back and forth? Yes, I am a Bowling Virgin. But, thanks to wonderful lane-neighbors (who are nicer than some of my real neighbors, ha) we muddled through set-up and played three games. We also experienced bowling alley pizza and then finished up with a rowsing game of air hockey.

BB at the Bowling Alley

It was a blast! $27 poorer, we left to make a quick trip to Trader Joe’s (had to get some wine for our Mexican food-themed Nascar race party on Sunday) and then to the post office to mail a friend something. He did great on both errands! Well, great may be an exaggeration, but he didn’t get mad, and that works. He’d never been to the post office before, and he really doesn’t care if he never goes again. (One guy in front of us hadn’t been around for delivery and took quite a while to complain about it..over and over despite a long line of waiting people.) But, still, he did it, I got all my errands completed, and we came home where he could decompress while I caught up on stuff, checked in at work, and made crabcakes (homemade) for dinner. In another 1.5 hours, we’re off (or maybe just me — I’ve been bribed with a Roadhouse Tea) to pick up dh from the airport. He gets to help me further plan Sunday’s party, though he can’t attend. But, it was his idea, so he’s not off the hook that easy.

Enjoy your weekend, and if you’re hiding your child in your house until mine goes away, shame on you. He’s autistic, not stupid.